Dear Santa Claus...
Home Alone, and what Illinois kids asked Santa in the dynasty days
“Dear Santa,
I would want a Michael Jordan Pro basketball, (a) Bulls sweatshirt and pants and I want a Bulls coat and I would like a bulls towel … and I would like Chicago bulls pillow … and I would like a chicago bulls hat and I would like a short sleve chicago bull shirt…”
— A young Bulls fan from Mount Carmel, Illinois, 1992
I’ve written a bunch about the power and influence of Bulls merchandise, and a perfect way to crystallize that is Home Alone. In 1990, when Kevin McCallister rigged his living room into a crime-fighting mannequin dance party, Michael Jordan was already a national hero, making Buzz’s full-size MJ cutout perfect to attach to a train set to fool the Wet Bandits.
Roger Ebert memorably described the traps in Home Alone as “the kinds of traps that any 8-year-old could devise, if he had a budget of tens of thousands of dollars and the assistance of a crew of movie special effects people.” That’s true, but the component parts were mostly real, including MJ — kids really were buying life-size cardboard cutouts of Jordan, often adorned like the one in Buzz’s room: with a ruler, so that you could compare your height to Jordan.1
The MJ poster in Home Alone works as a character detail, but that wouldn’t be enough justification for set design in a movie sold to a national American audience. The filmmakers weren’t absolute sticklers to location truth: Joe Pesci shows up in Winnetka dressed as a Chicago cop with the Chicago flag on his jacket, and no one notices.2
Then later, when the McCallisters get the local police to send someone to the house, another cop with a Chicago flag on his jacket shows up. These are avoidable errors, and I assume they are made because for a national American audience, it’s more fun to see a police officer with a recognizable flag on his jacket than whatever the Winnetka police wore.3
That’s the key to the Michael Jordan poster: it fits because the McCallister family would have that poster and because a national audience would get a tickle out of seeing cardboard MJ circling on the train tracks. Mike was that famous. And the McCallister boys would have absolutely asked Santa for an MJ poster. Many Illinois kids did.
I know that because my brother and I did, and because thankfully, loads of newspapers published these Santa letters. Below is a sampling of these requests, along with a wonderful team Christmas photo from the 1985-86 season, shared by Stuart Albeck, granddaughter of the late Bulls head coach Stan Albeck.
Looking for a last-minute Secret Santa gift for tomorrow? Get the Bulls fan in your life a subscription to this newsletter! Or, if you want to give someone an I.O.U. and deliver them a gift closer to New Years, grab a copy of “WHY WE ROOT.” I’m donating half of my proceeds in December to Chicago youth journalism/media organization True Star. Please join me!
And now… Illinois kids asking Santa Claus for Bulls gear.
1990: Ben Brown has been a good boy and wants a Bulls hat.
1991: Jose has been a good boy and wants a Bulls coat.
1992: Tyler Weikle would like an MJ sweatsuit “and any Scottie Pippen stuff you have”! I love the Pippen request.
1993: Dave Demitropoulos, age 7, requests a full Michael Jordan outfit: a jersey, shorts, a long-sleeve shirt and a hat.
1994: Chloe Torres, 18 months old, would like a Chicago Bulls outfit like Joey’s.
1995: Notable historical point here, as Christopher Grant Stoltz requests not just a black Bulls jersey and shorts.
That was new that season; the Dennis Rodman jersey I bought that fall was black.
1996: Mike, a reader of the Northwest Herald, wants a triple Bulls lineup in the aftermath of 72-10: an MJ shirt, and Rodman and Pippen jerseys.
But he also wants a Mark Rypien jersey? Huh?
1997: 2nd grader Gary Lynn Green Jr. has two Bulls requests: one coat, one back pack.
1998: This is a rather curious request list from Jordan Torbert of Forsyth, Illinois.
Young Jordan requests jerseys of Scottie Pippen, Shannon Sharpe, Mateen Cleaves in his junior year at Michigan State, Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa and John Elway. Tough run for the Bears here at the end of the Wanny era.
1999: Incredibly, after the dynasty ended, no children in Illinois wrote to Santa requesting Bulls gear. At least none that were published in the newspaper.
But C.J.H. of Decatur requested “Michael Jordan clothes.” That'll work.
Lastly, as promised, the 1986 Chicago Bulls in Christmas hats, courtesy of Stuart Albeck, granddaughter of Stan, who is seated in the middle row between Jerry Krause and Tex Winter. What a gem.
This story is made possible by the wonderful Newspapers.com. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all!
Best,
Jack
In a pitch-perfect character detail, one of the signs of Buzz’s villainy is that along with his MJ poster, he also has an Isiah Thomas poster. This is unthinkable for a kid in Winnetka, with only three possible explanations. One, the McCallisters were from Michigan, and Buzz had the MJ poster just to try to fit in with Chicago fans. Two, the McCallisters lived on the West Side before moving to Winnetka and were Bulls fans who also loved Isiah from the neighborhood and then at St. Joseph’s. Three, Buzz was in grade school, let’s say, in the early 1980s, and was short and played point guard and had a family history with Indiana University, and became an Isiah fan in the pre-MJ days. None of those scenarios describe Buzz, who was about 13 in the movie, meaning he was about four when the Pistons drafted Isiah, and who is about 5’10, so tall for his age and definitely not playing point guard at, you know, Washburne or wherever he went to middle school. There is no indication that his family was from Michigan, we see no Hoosiers gear (his cousin is wearing a NORTHWESTERN sweatshirt), and there is no way that John Hughes wrote a backstory that the McCallisters spent the early 80s over at Homan south of Madison. There really is nothing to connect Buzz to Isiah Thomas other than the filmmakers wanting to further underline that Buzz is a goon. I say this as someone who really liked Isiah growing up but for him being THE man on the Pistons, meaning I would never think to have an Isiah poster up, nor would that be allowed. It would be like parents installing asbestos into the nursery. It would never happen.
The incredible fan theory that Peter McCallister’s wealth comes from being a mob boss or perhaps a lawyer for the Outfit is undercut by him, A. not knowing Pesci (you would know the cops who come to your house, or at least say, “Are you new on the force?”) and B. not spotting that Chicago flag.
The Winnetka cop in full Chicagoese: “Dere’s no one home. Da house looks secure. Tell ‘em to count deir kids uh-gain.”
I still own that MJ cutout